The Usual Suspect

(joining The Anderson Crew for Embrace the Camera)

So someone (not naming names, since I don't have definitive evidence, but I do have several years of prior history to work with and that may possibly be his mugshot right up there.  No, not that one.  His child.) turned on alllll the interior lights in my van, left them on, and wandered off.

I discovered this, or rather, I discovered the results of this, at 6:50 p.m. yesterday, as I was attempting to load six kids into said van in the icy cold darkness to make my way to church for a meeting.

Lotus ran into the house as I was stuffing the baby into her snowsuit plus 19 additional layers, gasping that the van wouldn't turn on (it's her job to start the car and warm it up.  She feels like a rockstar, and I get a toasty warm car), and she thought the battery was dead.

Sure enough, it was kaput.  I unloaded four cold children, hysterical from sitting in a pitch black van in the sub-zero blackness (egged on by an older brother telling them to watch out for fisher cats), herded them into the house, and called someone to explain that the meeting would have to procede without my more-amusing-than-useful services.

This morning, Ken tried to jump the van, which predictably, refused to respond.

With temps in the single digits, I'm happy just to let the stupid beast sit at the bottom of my driveway until spring, but Ken keeps being all practical and reminding me about things like the homeschool co-op and the Pinewood Derby and Mass and such.

None of this would happen if I lived in Tahiti.  It would always be warm, and I'd be able to walk anywhere that I needed to go.

Come on Ford- let's work on that Tahiti transfer, ok?